How to Choose the Right Women’s Retreat for You
If you’ve ever searched for a women’s retreat, you already know there are a lot of options.
Wellness retreats. Yoga retreats. Spiritual retreats. Luxury retreats. Personal growth retreats. Weekend retreats. Mountains. Beaches. Packed schedules. Plenty of downtime.
It can be a little overwhelming.
And honestly, I don’t think choosing the right retreat should start with asking which one is the “best.”
It should start with asking:
What do I need right now?
Because the retreat your friend would love might not be the retreat you need at all.
So if you’ve been thinking about attending one—whether you’re seriously searching or just starting to wonder what it might be like—here are some of the things I would think about before choosing.
1. Start With Why You Want to Go
You don't need to have some big life-changing reason for wanting to attend a retreat.
Maybe you're exhausted.
Maybe you've spent so much time taking care of work, family and everyone else's needs that you can't remember the last time you did something entirely for yourself.
Maybe you're going through a transition.
Maybe you're craving connection.
Maybe you want to meet new people and try something you've never done before.
Or maybe you can't explain it at all. You just keep seeing retreats and thinking:
I want to do that.
That's a reason too.
Before you start comparing destinations and itineraries, think about what you're hoping to get from the experience.
Not necessarily what you want to do.
How do you want to feel?
Rested? Inspired? Connected? Challenged? Peaceful? Energized? Like yourself again?
That answer can tell you a lot about the type of retreat that's going to be right for you.
2. Look Beyond the Beautiful Pictures
I'm all for a beautiful location. Believe me, setting matters.
But beautiful pictures can only tell you so much.
Once you've admired the beach, the mountains, the gorgeous resort or the cozy cabin, start reading.
What does the retreat actually feel like?
Read the website. Look at the social media. Read about the person creating it and the people leading the experiences.
Does the language resonate with you?
Does it feel welcoming?
Does it feel overly structured or just structured enough?
Does it feel like a place where you could actually be yourself?
Sometimes two retreats can offer many of the same things — yoga, meditation, workshops, beautiful meals — and still create completely different experiences.
Pay attention to the feeling behind the itinerary, not just the itinerary itself.
3. Decide How Much “Doing” You Actually Want to Do
This is a big one for me.
A retreat can have an incredible schedule and still have too much on the schedule for what you need.
There's a difference between thoughtfully planned and completely packed.
If you spend your everyday life rushing from one thing to another, do you really want to spend your retreat doing the same thing?
Maybe you do! Some women love having a full itinerary and want to experience everything possible while they're there.
But maybe you want yoga in the morning and two hours by the pool in the afternoon.
Maybe you want to have a great conversation at lunch without looking at the clock because you need to be somewhere in ten minutes.
Maybe you want to take a nap.
Look for the balance that's right for you.
Personally, I believe some of the most meaningful moments can happen in the spaces between what's scheduled.
4. Think About the Size of the Group
This can completely change the experience.
A large retreat can have incredible energy. There are lots of people to meet, activities happening and opportunities to connect.
A smaller retreat can feel more intimate. You may have more opportunities to actually get to know the women around you rather than simply recognizing their faces by the end of the weekend.
Neither one is right or wrong.
Ask yourself which environment makes you feel more comfortable.
If authentic connection is one of the reasons you're considering a retreat, I'd pay particular attention to group size and how the retreat creates opportunities for people to actually connect.
5. Ask Yourself the Question Almost Everyone Asks:
“But Who Would I Go With?”
This might be one of the biggest reasons women hesitate.
You find a retreat you love.
You can picture yourself there.
And then you think:
Who am I going to go with?
Maybe the answer is no one.
And yes, showing up by yourself can feel intimidating.
You might wonder whether everyone else will already know someone. Who you'll sit with at dinner. Whether you'll feel awkward walking in alone. Whether you'll fit in.
Those are completely reasonable things to wonder about.
But there's also something really interesting about walking into an experience where nobody knows you as someone's wife, mom, daughter, coworker, boss or best friend.
You get to arrive simply as you.
If you're considering attending alone, look for a retreat that seems intentional about making people feel welcomed without forcing connection.
Because there's a difference between creating opportunities for connection and making everyone participate in some uncomfortable version of forced bonding.
Connection should have room to happen naturally.
6. Figure Out What “Wellness” Means to You
The word wellness gets used a lot.
And it doesn't mean the same thing to everyone.
For some women, wellness might mean yoga, meditation, breathwork or movement.
For someone else, it might mean sleeping until 9:00, drinking coffee while looking at the ocean and not answering an email.
It can be laughing with a group of women over dinner.
Trying something you've never done before.
Sitting quietly by yourself.
Getting dressed up and feeling beautiful.
Having a conversation that makes you look at something differently.
Or simply having a few hours when nobody needs anything from you.
So don't assume a wellness retreat requires you to already be a yogi, meditate every morning or live some perfectly balanced life.
Look at what the retreat actually offers and decide whether that version of wellness feels good to you.
7. Pay Attention to the People Behind the Retreat
I think this gets overlooked.
Who created the retreat?
Why did they create it?
Who are the facilitators?
What experience do they bring?
What seems important to them?
You're trusting these people with more than your money. You're trusting them with your time and, in some cases, a pretty personal experience.
I don't think you need to agree with everything the host believes or feel some instant connection through a website.
But you should get the sense that there's intention behind what's being created.
And if something feels overly scripted, impersonal or simply not like you?
That's okay.
It may be a wonderful retreat.
It just may not be your retreat.
8. Look at What You're Actually Paying For
This isn't the glamorous part, but it's important.
A retreat is an investment.
Before you commit, make sure you understand what the registration includes and what it doesn't.
Are accommodations included or separate?
What meals are included?
Are the activities included?
Will you need airfare?
Transportation?
Are there additional fees?
Is there a deposit?
Are payment plans available?
Don't be afraid to ask questions.
You should feel comfortable with what you're committing to before you make that commitment.
And I think this is especially important because a retreat shouldn't begin with you feeling stressed or confused about what you purchased.
9. Ask Yourself Whether There Is Space for You
This one is personal for me.
I've attended retreats where I felt like I was moving from one session or module to the next, doing everything I was supposed to do...
but I never really felt like anyone knew my story.
I participated.
I showed up.
I checked the boxes.
But something was missing.
That experience stayed with me.
So when you're considering a retreat, I think it's worth asking:
Is there room for me in this experience?
Not just another participant.
Me.
My story. My personality. My comfort level. My reason for being there.
Is there room to participate without performing?
To connect without being forced?
To have quiet time without feeling like I'm missing something?
To show up exactly as I am?
For me, that's become one of the most important parts of what a retreat can be.
10. And Finally...Can You Picture Yourself There?
After you've considered everything else, come back to this.
Close your eyes for a second and picture it.
Can you see yourself arriving?
Walking into dinner?
Trying that yoga class even though you're a little nervous?
Sitting outside with your coffee in the morning?
Talking to someone you didn't know the day before?
Having an hour completely to yourself?
Can you picture yourself exhaling?
There's no perfect formula for choosing a retreat.
Sometimes you've done all the research, looked at all the details and compared all the options — and something still comes down to a feeling.
You keep going back to one.
You keep thinking about it.
You can see yourself there.
Pay attention to that.
Your Retreat Should Feel Like Your Retreat
The “best” women's retreat isn't necessarily the most expensive, the most luxurious, the most transformational or the one with the longest itinerary.
It's the one that feels right for you.
Maybe you need adventure.
Maybe you need rest.
Maybe you need to laugh.
Maybe you need to meet new people.
Maybe you need to challenge yourself.
Maybe you need meaningful conversation.
Or maybe you just need a couple of days when you can step away from everything else and remember what it feels like to simply be.
Whatever you're looking for, choose an experience that leaves room for it.
And more importantly, one that leaves room for you.
Thinking About Attending a Women's Retreat?
At Unfiltered Retreats, we're creating thoughtfully curated women's retreat experiences centered on wellness, reflection, authentic connection and the freedom to simply be.
Comments